i decided today that i had to leave my job, effective uhm..immediately....it was a tough thing to do, but for many, many, many reasons, i had to do it...
it had to be a clean break, which i hated also to do...i wanted to try to do a two week notice type thing...but right now i'm under so much stress and pressure with these classes, that i really have to focus on my studies first and foremost...
my mom stands behind me in this, and has said that if it comes to the point where i need to totally give up my job so i can just focus on schooling, then she will be behind me in that...
it's going to be hard, i do love those kids so very much...but i also need to be able to step back and say "this isn't working..." .... i felt like i was becoming burned out among other things...(dare i say i even wondered a few times about my mental health?!...)
i have been stressed, irritable, shorter on patience than normal, running on not enough sleep, and really just feeling like i wasn't well -- physically, emotionally, and even spiritually...
so maybe now things will be a bit easier for me...time will tell, i guess...
....
anyways, i'm exhausted and i desperately need sleep.... tomorrow i'll be finishing the book and writing the essay... wich me luck, everyone...
....
then i've got class, and with that more homework (of course!) .... interesting how that happens, eh?...
also, this week i'll be starting to prepare for my experiencing the arts class...that meets the weekend of the 13th, 14th, and 15th...i've got lots of reading to do before the first class meets...
and then some discussions will be taking place that weekend on what had been read... i'll be in enfield that weekend, which i'm really looking forward to....
i do so enjoy visiting family down there...
....
that reminds me -- one good thing that happened today -- i saw julia at church today (she was up from enfield visiting her mom's mom)...and she was very glad to see me!!...
and, she told me all about her new baby brother, and her new baby sister....(her mom & her boyfriend concieved right around the time of her dad & his girlfriend...the babies were born within a week of each other, i do believe...)
....
there's a picture i took of julia one evening in my back yard...it was when her dad (who is my first cousin) was home visiting from iraq, and we had him, julia, my aunt & uncle, my other uncle, and a few of my siblings over for home made bread & biscuits, baked beans, and hot dogs....it was a great time...
i was showing pete (my cousin) my garden, as he wanted to see it, and i noticed a garter snake crawling around...i picked it up and asked peter if julia liked snakes....
he said "i'm not sure if she's seen any yet?..."
so i showed her the snake and she asked to hold it...
i asked her dad and he said "well, it can't hurt...if it bites her, she'll just never want to touch a snake again, which wouldn't bother me any..."
well, the snake did not bite julia...even though julia kissed the snake...i missed that shot, but i did manage to capture this one here....
isn't that a great shot?....you can see the first row of corn in my garden in the background of this picture...
julia has grown and changed so much since this picture was taken, but i still absolutely adore this shot of her...and no, not because i took it...just because it's a really neat "little kid" shot...
....
anyhow, my pillow's calling my name... i'm off to bed...
good night, all...
-ramona anne
No comments:
Post a Comment