so, last night i watched the news, which isn't something i have had a lot of time for lately...and i saw that they were planning on executing saddam hussein sometime in the near future...
my heart was somehow saddened by this news...
i know that under his ruling many people were killed...lives and families were destroyed...and that maybe if he had been executed long before this then maybe 9/11 never would have happened (there are those theories floating around out there...)
however...deep down inside, he was just as much of a human as you and as me...
i was looking over some of the photos at yahoo today...there is one that shows him with his young grandson...it is an older photo, no doubt...but it is still a photo that shows him as a human being just like anyone else on this earth...he had children in his life that he loved and that i am sure loved him...he had a family...
and i know that so many of the people who died as a result of the way he handled things had families as well...
however...does killing someone (even someone as disliked by many people) make the pain of the loss of a loved one go away?...i can't say for certain, but i'd be willing to bet the answer, in most cases, if people were truly honest with themselves, would be "you know...not really..."
does it bring the people back to life?...absolutely not...
does it cause more hurt and anger and bitterness?...absolutely...
...
think about how we as a nation reacted to 9/11...most of us were mad...most of us said "let's go after them..." most of us wanted to retaliate...and, in a way, we did...and we've still got troops over there...
however...i don't think that killing someone like saddam will really benefit anyone all that much....
imagine if someone from iraq came over and caught president bush and had a lawsuit and found him guilty of the deaths of all the american soldiers who have died in iraq...how would we as americans feel?...
then imagine how we might feel if not only did they find him guilty but they chose to execute him?...
i know for certain that we would be absolutely ticked off as a nation (and i'm willing to bet that even those who aren't necessarily supporters of bush would take issue with the iraqi people coming and messing with us and taking our president and finding him guilty and executing him...)
now i know that it was the iraqi people who executed saddam...and i know that things were going to happen no matter what....
but what does this really do for any of us?....
....
i have looked through some of the yahoo photos...and you know what i see?...i see a nation divided...some people were cheering and so glad that saddam was executed...i also saw many who still had respect and loyalty for the man...
i look in my heart and you know what i see?...sadness that we are a nation -- and a world, even, who feels that killing one "big person" like saddam will somehow magically "fix things" .... i see sadness that we think so little of him that his death is a thing that would be a "victory" in our eyes....
i don't feel happy over his execution....i feel sad for the loss of a husband, a father, and a grandfather...
i'm reminded of the words of a carrie newcomer song...it was one she wrote in response to 9/11...the song is called "i heard an owl" and i think the words -- especially the chorus -- are fitting for today...
i heard an owl
carrie newcomer
i heard an owl call last night
homeless and confused
and i stood naked and bewildered
at the evil people do
and up upon the hill there is a terrible sign
that tells a story of what darkness waits
if we leave the light behind
so don't tell me hate is ever right or God's will
these are the wheels we put in motion ourselves
and the whole world weeps and is weeping still
though shaken i still believe
the best of what we all can be
and the only peace this world will know
can only come from love
i am a voice that's calling out
across the great divide
and i am only just one person that
feels they have to try
and the questions fall like trees or dust
and rise like prayers above
but the only word is courage and the only answer love
so don't tell me hate is ever right or God's will
these are the wheels we put in motion ourselves
and the whole world weeps and is weeping still
though shaken i still believe
the best of what we all can be
and the only peace this world will know
can only come from love
light every candle that you can
we need some light to see
in these days of deepest loss
treat each other tenderly
and the arms of God will gather in
each sparrow that falls
but makes no seperation
just fiercely loves us all
so don't tell me hate is ever right or God's will
these are the wheels we put in motion ourselves
and the whole world weeps and is weeping still
though shaken i still believe
the best of what we all can be
and the only peace this world will know
can only come from love
so don't tell me hate is ever right or God's will
these are the wheels we put in motion ourselves
and the whole world weeps and is weeping still
though shaken i still believe
the best of what we all can be
and the only peace this world will know
can only come from love
can only come from love
can only come from love
..........
violence never solves anything...it just creates more violence, it would seem....
and to be honest with you all, i fear that there is a strong possibility that there may be some retaliation towards the US from the iraqi people....
even though there are people who are celebrating his execution, i can't help but wonder what those who are staging the protests may do -- in their own country -- to our troops that are over there...and to their own people who were in favor of the execution...
i'm not really taking a stand one way or the other here, except to say that violence is not the answer...that's all i will say...because there are three sides to every story...your side, the other guy's side, and the truth...
i feel sad for everyone who lost someone either under saddam's rulership...or today with him being executed...and i feel sad for those who lost a loved one to the war...wether they were american or iraqi...or of another race...
it's sad...very, very sad...
i hope you will all serach your own hearts and find, if nothing else, that you agree with me on this one thing -- the violence doesn't fix or solve any problems...and maybe help find some way aside from all the violence to solve and fix what is happening in the world today...
may you all have peace in your hearts and homes...
-ramona anne
Saturday, December 30, 2006
Friday, December 29, 2006
what kind of bird is that?...
as some of you know by now i have taken an interest in birds...i have three feeders that are currently hanging, plus one in my house that is full of niger (or thistle) seed that i want to hang up but realized after i filled it that i don't really have a good place to hang it right now...
anyways, i'm used to seeing the chickadees and jays and hairy & downy woodpeckers at my feeders...they're there and i'm glad...
the other day, however, a new bird showed up...one that i didn't ever recall seeing in real life with my own eyes...
what struck me about this new bird was that it had black on it's head similar to a chickadee, but it also had on it's head some white striping...
i knew it wasn't a chickadee, but i was baffled as to what this new (to me) bird might be...i watched it for a moment and then noticed it seemed to prefer being upside down...
"ahhh...i know nuthatches are quite fond of being upside down..." i thought and quickly turned to my field guide...sure enough this new visitor was a nuthatch...more specifically, a red breasted nuthatch...
i was very happy to see it at my feeder...it came back the next day as well, although i haven't seen it today....
red breasted nuthatches nest anywhere from 5 to 40 feet of the ground although in rare instances they nest higher, as far as 120 feet above ground...they lay anywhere from 4 to 7 eggs at a time and the incubation period is 12 days....they breed and nest in coniferous and mixed deciduous forests, but seem to have a preference for the coniferous forests...they eat seeds and insects mostly and are known to stay in their breeding area during winter if there is adequate food...
so now you all know a bit more about the red breasted nuthatch...(and so do i!...) the information above was taken and paraphrased from "the birder's handbook a field guide to the natural history of north american birds" by paul ehrlich, david dobkin and darryl wheye...
.......
i suppouse that's about all for now...
i'm glad that the birds are around, they certainly do brighten up a cold winter day!!...
anyways, i'm used to seeing the chickadees and jays and hairy & downy woodpeckers at my feeders...they're there and i'm glad...
the other day, however, a new bird showed up...one that i didn't ever recall seeing in real life with my own eyes...
what struck me about this new bird was that it had black on it's head similar to a chickadee, but it also had on it's head some white striping...
i knew it wasn't a chickadee, but i was baffled as to what this new (to me) bird might be...i watched it for a moment and then noticed it seemed to prefer being upside down...
"ahhh...i know nuthatches are quite fond of being upside down..." i thought and quickly turned to my field guide...sure enough this new visitor was a nuthatch...more specifically, a red breasted nuthatch...
i was very happy to see it at my feeder...it came back the next day as well, although i haven't seen it today....
red breasted nuthatches nest anywhere from 5 to 40 feet of the ground although in rare instances they nest higher, as far as 120 feet above ground...they lay anywhere from 4 to 7 eggs at a time and the incubation period is 12 days....they breed and nest in coniferous and mixed deciduous forests, but seem to have a preference for the coniferous forests...they eat seeds and insects mostly and are known to stay in their breeding area during winter if there is adequate food...
so now you all know a bit more about the red breasted nuthatch...(and so do i!...) the information above was taken and paraphrased from "the birder's handbook a field guide to the natural history of north american birds" by paul ehrlich, david dobkin and darryl wheye...
.......
i suppouse that's about all for now...
i'm glad that the birds are around, they certainly do brighten up a cold winter day!!...
take care everyone...
until next time,
-ramona anne
Sunday, December 17, 2006
being "too nice" classes for next term, and Christmas...
apparently it's possible to be too nice...i recently learned this when a certain person in my life was feeling a little uncomfortable with some gifts and cards i had given them....maybe they were a little uncomfortable with a few other things as well, i don't really know for sure...
but there are a lot of other people i can be nice to, so i guess it's okay...
.......
also, i finally decided on classes for next term...i'm going to take introduction to drawing, which should be fun...and i'm also going to take creativity: the untapped potential...that should be a good class as well...
....
so, i realized today that it's only a week away from Christmas eve...how on earth did it sneak up on me so fast this year?!?!....
guess who barely has any shopping done?...and guess who has only made out about ten cards, if even that?....
i can't believe it's come up so fast....
i guess i need to get my act together and do some cards, and some shopping, and some baking this week....
....
anyhow...i guess that is about all for now...it seems my blog posts as of late have been less and less substantial....
i will try harder to rectify that in the future...
....
happy holidays to all...
-ramona anne
but there are a lot of other people i can be nice to, so i guess it's okay...
.......
also, i finally decided on classes for next term...i'm going to take introduction to drawing, which should be fun...and i'm also going to take creativity: the untapped potential...that should be a good class as well...
....
so, i realized today that it's only a week away from Christmas eve...how on earth did it sneak up on me so fast this year?!?!....
guess who barely has any shopping done?...and guess who has only made out about ten cards, if even that?....
i can't believe it's come up so fast....
i guess i need to get my act together and do some cards, and some shopping, and some baking this week....
....
anyhow...i guess that is about all for now...it seems my blog posts as of late have been less and less substantial....
i will try harder to rectify that in the future...
....
happy holidays to all...
-ramona anne
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
what next?...
i have finished this term at granite state college...i feel i will do fairly well in my classes...i got A's & B's on the homework assignments in my classes this term, so i'm guessing my 3.7 won't be affected too much...
i should know later this month what my grades are, and what my GPA will be... i can hardly wait to find out my grades...
i'm glad this term is done, as i do feel like i am ready for a break...however, i also know there will be this part of me that, just like last december, wants to still be in classes and wants to be doing homework...
anyhow...there's not too much to say right now...but then again, there is...i've got so many things i'm trying to figure out and sort out in my life, but i just feel like this isn't quite the place to be writing about some of these things...
i hope you are all doing well...
happy holiday season to all,
-ramona anne
i should know later this month what my grades are, and what my GPA will be... i can hardly wait to find out my grades...
i'm glad this term is done, as i do feel like i am ready for a break...however, i also know there will be this part of me that, just like last december, wants to still be in classes and wants to be doing homework...
anyhow...there's not too much to say right now...but then again, there is...i've got so many things i'm trying to figure out and sort out in my life, but i just feel like this isn't quite the place to be writing about some of these things...
i hope you are all doing well...
happy holiday season to all,
-ramona anne
Thursday, November 23, 2006
it's time for another update...
first and foremost -- Happy Thanksgiving, Everyone!!...
i hope you all had a great holiday...my day was quiet and low key and held a few pleasant surprises....the best one was a last minute invitation to my brother's for dinner...my mom & i went down and helped him & his girlfriend eat their 20 pound turkey...
tomorrow is the "big day" with most of the family at my sister's...
...
yesterday i got a letter from the college...on the back of the letter was an intent to graduate form, which i must file in order to graduate with my associates in june...of course, i will fill taht out and mail it back in and things...
the thought of graduation is one that both excites and frightens me at the same time...i've never graduated from anything aside from kindergarden and the DARE program at school, so this is serious business...it's frightening because it means that i have finally "made something of myself" so to speak....and because it's the end of a chapter in my life...however, i will soon be writing a new chapter, as i plan on going for my bachelors in education after...
so, it's not really all THAT frightening, i guess...but, it's very overwhelming....
last night i was quite excited about it all (and it's still seven months away!!...) and had trouble falling asleep...
it certainly is an exciting thing...it's like "wow...this is REALLY happening..." ....
...
also, a good freind of mine from illinois may come to my graduation, if the dates will be compatible with her summer plans....i should know more about that by this time next week...
i called plymouth state university this week and they are sending me a catalog so i can look things over and see what kind of programs they offer so i can think about what i want to do after i've got my associates...if granite state offers an education program (which i believe they might) i may just continue with them as long as i can, and then head to plymouth state afterwards....
i know it will be a lot of work, but anything worth doing in this life does take a lot of work....reaching goals isn't always easy...but the end result is worth all the work, all the time and energy...it's worth everything...
....
my brother ray seemed very proud of me when i told him today that i got my intent to graduate form...i think he's finally seeing me as an adult and he takes me a lot more seriously now...that in and of itself is a great feeling and is very rewarding...
*hmm* maybe, just maybe, i *AM* growing up....
who knew?....
....
anyhow...i'm off to bed...
tomorrow will be a busy day, and i want to be rested up for it...
....
soon i hope to get back to posting once a week about birds that are around...at my feeder so far i have seen cardinals, blue jays, black capped chickadees, hairy woodpeckers, and downy woodpeckers...
also, i had a pieleated woodpecker in the yard a week ago yesterday...i watched it flying overhead and then saw it land and start tapping away on a tree...it was back again the next day, but i haven't seen it since....
also, there have been some mourning doves hanging out in one of the trees, and i think they're sticking around because they're being fed...
it's nice to see the birds around...it livens things up a bit...
...
to be continued....
-ramona anne
i hope you all had a great holiday...my day was quiet and low key and held a few pleasant surprises....the best one was a last minute invitation to my brother's for dinner...my mom & i went down and helped him & his girlfriend eat their 20 pound turkey...
tomorrow is the "big day" with most of the family at my sister's...
...
yesterday i got a letter from the college...on the back of the letter was an intent to graduate form, which i must file in order to graduate with my associates in june...of course, i will fill taht out and mail it back in and things...
the thought of graduation is one that both excites and frightens me at the same time...i've never graduated from anything aside from kindergarden and the DARE program at school, so this is serious business...it's frightening because it means that i have finally "made something of myself" so to speak....and because it's the end of a chapter in my life...however, i will soon be writing a new chapter, as i plan on going for my bachelors in education after...
so, it's not really all THAT frightening, i guess...but, it's very overwhelming....
last night i was quite excited about it all (and it's still seven months away!!...) and had trouble falling asleep...
it certainly is an exciting thing...it's like "wow...this is REALLY happening..." ....
...
also, a good freind of mine from illinois may come to my graduation, if the dates will be compatible with her summer plans....i should know more about that by this time next week...
i called plymouth state university this week and they are sending me a catalog so i can look things over and see what kind of programs they offer so i can think about what i want to do after i've got my associates...if granite state offers an education program (which i believe they might) i may just continue with them as long as i can, and then head to plymouth state afterwards....
i know it will be a lot of work, but anything worth doing in this life does take a lot of work....reaching goals isn't always easy...but the end result is worth all the work, all the time and energy...it's worth everything...
....
my brother ray seemed very proud of me when i told him today that i got my intent to graduate form...i think he's finally seeing me as an adult and he takes me a lot more seriously now...that in and of itself is a great feeling and is very rewarding...
*hmm* maybe, just maybe, i *AM* growing up....
who knew?....
....
anyhow...i'm off to bed...
tomorrow will be a busy day, and i want to be rested up for it...
....
soon i hope to get back to posting once a week about birds that are around...at my feeder so far i have seen cardinals, blue jays, black capped chickadees, hairy woodpeckers, and downy woodpeckers...
also, i had a pieleated woodpecker in the yard a week ago yesterday...i watched it flying overhead and then saw it land and start tapping away on a tree...it was back again the next day, but i haven't seen it since....
also, there have been some mourning doves hanging out in one of the trees, and i think they're sticking around because they're being fed...
it's nice to see the birds around...it livens things up a bit...
...
to be continued....
-ramona anne
Thursday, November 16, 2006
i should be sleeping...
....but i'm not....
i don't have to be up for another half an hour to get my day going...and yet, here i am, at 6:00 in the morning...tired but unable to sleep...
...
it was like that last night, too...i went to bed and i must have laid in bed for a good two hours, not able to sleep...as it is, i'm going to go into work and i'll be absolutely dragging today...oh, well...the kids are really good that i take care of, and i think it should be a fairly easy day...(i hope!) ...
....
i am not doing as well as i could be or should be...
despite the fact that i have somehow managed to get a 3.7 GPA up to this point, and i should get A's in both of my classes this term...and that some people i've told say they're all really proud of me, i still feel...off...
sometimes it just feels like no matter how well i'm doing academically, i can't shake the feeling that there's something wrong or something missing...i have hurts that i know still need to be healed...
i guess i thought that going to school would help or fix some of those things in me -- the low self esteem and the way i see myself and all of that....and maybe to a certain extent, it has helped...but, i know that there are still some things that i need to be healed from....i just hope it can happen soon....
....
i guess i should probably get going....it's almost 6:30 and i want to get things together so i can get in the tub and get ready to go in to work....
i absolutely adore the kids i'm taking care of right now...they are 18 months (a little girl) and almost four (her big brother) .... they are absolutely wonderful kids and i really, really enjoy them a lot...they seem to like me an awful lot, too...
have a beautiful day, everyone...
-ramona anne
i don't have to be up for another half an hour to get my day going...and yet, here i am, at 6:00 in the morning...tired but unable to sleep...
...
it was like that last night, too...i went to bed and i must have laid in bed for a good two hours, not able to sleep...as it is, i'm going to go into work and i'll be absolutely dragging today...oh, well...the kids are really good that i take care of, and i think it should be a fairly easy day...(i hope!) ...
....
i am not doing as well as i could be or should be...
despite the fact that i have somehow managed to get a 3.7 GPA up to this point, and i should get A's in both of my classes this term...and that some people i've told say they're all really proud of me, i still feel...off...
sometimes it just feels like no matter how well i'm doing academically, i can't shake the feeling that there's something wrong or something missing...i have hurts that i know still need to be healed...
i guess i thought that going to school would help or fix some of those things in me -- the low self esteem and the way i see myself and all of that....and maybe to a certain extent, it has helped...but, i know that there are still some things that i need to be healed from....i just hope it can happen soon....
....
i guess i should probably get going....it's almost 6:30 and i want to get things together so i can get in the tub and get ready to go in to work....
i absolutely adore the kids i'm taking care of right now...they are 18 months (a little girl) and almost four (her big brother) .... they are absolutely wonderful kids and i really, really enjoy them a lot...they seem to like me an awful lot, too...
have a beautiful day, everyone...
-ramona anne
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
a bit of an update...
wow, i'm so bad lately about updating...i've just been busy with other things....first of all, i know some of you are curious about the job at head start...i heard back from them one week ago, and they told me they didn't need me...oh, well...i'm still keeping a few mornings a week for someone in town, and that's a nice job for now...
i've been busy, busy with my final project for my experiencing the arts class and also doing homework for my addictions & family dynamics class...
i've also been going to home group on wednesdays, although i've been late the last two weeks -- like, really late...but it's okay, because things are starting to finally settle down, and that's good...
i registered for next term ... i'm going to be taking intro. to drawing which should be fun...and a class called men & women in cross cultural perspectives...that class should be interesting...
i'm half thinking of swapping the art class for something else, but i'm not 100% sure...i should know after this weekend, when i can talk face to face with my advisor (who is teaching my weekend long experiencing the arts class...) ...
if i can get my concentration credits all squeezed in this winter and spring, i would be able to graduate in June...and, my aunt also would be graduating at the same time...so i think i might like to try to do that...because i think it would be very cool and very special to graduate with her....
....
anyhow...that's about all for now...
i'm working tomorrow, so i should sign off and get myself to bed....
happy week to all,
-ramona anne
i've been busy, busy with my final project for my experiencing the arts class and also doing homework for my addictions & family dynamics class...
i've also been going to home group on wednesdays, although i've been late the last two weeks -- like, really late...but it's okay, because things are starting to finally settle down, and that's good...
i registered for next term ... i'm going to be taking intro. to drawing which should be fun...and a class called men & women in cross cultural perspectives...that class should be interesting...
i'm half thinking of swapping the art class for something else, but i'm not 100% sure...i should know after this weekend, when i can talk face to face with my advisor (who is teaching my weekend long experiencing the arts class...) ...
if i can get my concentration credits all squeezed in this winter and spring, i would be able to graduate in June...and, my aunt also would be graduating at the same time...so i think i might like to try to do that...because i think it would be very cool and very special to graduate with her....
....
anyhow...that's about all for now...
i'm working tomorrow, so i should sign off and get myself to bed....
happy week to all,
-ramona anne
Saturday, November 11, 2006
the weeks go by so fast...
i had a bit of an off week this week...well, at least the beginning of it was off...
monday i went to class, like i always do...there were some things that were brought up in class that left me feeling really emotionally drained by the end of the evening...i left class and i ran into fran (a friend of mine who i have had for a few classes, and who teaches a class in the same building as my class, and during the same time frame...)
so we are talking and she could tell i wasn't my usual self...so she and i talked for a little while and then i went to go pick up my mom at my aunt's and she headed home...
the next morning i got a nice email from her, which really made my day start of on a brighter tone...then i went in to babysit...and of course, that was really good -- to be with the kids...(they do my heart such good...) ...
tuesday afternoon and evening was okay...i filled my bird feeders and spent some time outside, enjoying myself, although i wasn't really "happy" ... i mostly just coasted for the evening...
wednesday was a rough day....i felt off all day...it was greay and gloomy, which made a big difference, i think, in how i felt...
i was almost about 40 minutes late for home group, and even before i left the yard i was in a small fender bender accident...my brother (wo seems to be moving back in, and i am REALLY having a rough time with THAT....) has decided that he needs to work on his truck here, in our yard...but he doesn't have the money for the parts...so, his truck is just sitting in the yard...up on the jack, becuase the wheel is off....
it was dark and rainy wednesday evening...and, his truck hasn't been there that long, and i had forgotten it was there...
his truck is solid...and, i backed into it and crunched the fender....i don't know how much it's going to cost, but it will need to be repaired...i am VERY upset about this...
i didn't notice, though, that anything had been done to it, until yesterday....
so, i don't know what i should do -- call the insurance company, or just try to fix it myself somehow...
at any rate, i'm VERY upset...
....
thursday was better...my aunt & cousin came up and spent the night, and my cousin and i went to youth group...okay, i'm really technically too old for it...but because leah was with me i was able to stay and hang out, which was nice...
before we went to youth group, we all went to eat at tony's pizza and sub shop...i got myself a buffalo wrap, which i hadn't had in over a year...i forgot how addictive those things can be!...lol!!...
...
leah and i (and our moms of course!!) came home and leah and i stayed up until like, 2:00 in the morning talking...it was nice to catch up with her, though...
then we went to bed and i fell asleep pretty quickly....i woke up around 8:30-ish yesterday morning...
i started working on my project for next weekend's "experiencing the arts" class...i am going to share some of my photography...and share a bit on the history of photography, i guess...
after leah got up we hung out some but didn't go anywhere, which was fine...
we had a nice dinner (lunch) of corn chowder and grilled cheese and then hung out until the garage called to let my aunt know her car was ready (she came up to have work done on it here...)
so we took them down to the car, then my mom and i ran a few small/fast errands...we headed home and i was almost home when my friend moira called my cell phone and said her crew was home and i could head out to have supper (dinner) with them...
so, i dropped my mom off, grabbed a few things and headed out there and had a nice meal, walk, and visit...
they have two dogs who proved to be very entertaining when i started playing some bird calls on my iTunes on my laptop...that was hilarious...these two dogs would cock their heads from side to side and try to figure out where the sounds were coming from...it was too cute!!...
one of them even came right up to my laptop and was sniffing at it trying to figure it out...
my cat, on the other hand, could care less when i play my bird calls...
go figure...
....
that's about all the "news" for now...
i didn't get to bed until after 2:00 again this morning, but i slept in until about 10:20....
....
my brother came in while i was getting ready for bed, apparently with the intention of staying in his old room...i was upstairs and in my room in bed before he came up and he was REALLY upset because his bed had been stripped and the bedding was being washed...
(okay...keep in mind that he has moved out...he has not been here for months...)
the other two beds in that room had been freshly made up the night before for my aunt & cousin...you think he would have just climbed into one of those bed, right?...wrong...he had to turn the lights on and trash and crash and throw things around and swear and cuss and yell and make all this noise becuase he was angry because his bed had been stripped to wash teh sheets and blankets...
he just took some of the bedding off each of the beds, then threw what had been on his bed onto those other two beds, made his bed and slept there...
i'm very un-impressed with my brother right now for a number of reasons...
his behaviour last night was totally inappropriate and unacceptable...
i think with my next paycheck i'm going to buy a new doorknob so he can't pull any of those stunts anymore...
....
it'd be different if he was here for a few days until his truck would be fixed...but the thing is, he isn't even working on the truck....
soon the snow is going to come and the plow will need room to turn around...and if his truck stays where it is, the plow won't be able to come turn around...and we could end up having to shovel ourselves out...
the town has maintained this road forever -- and we're grandfathered into it....(besides, my mom is in her 70's and the town does take care of it's older residents...) but, if the plow can't turn around, i really don't think they'd be obligated to plow us out until we fixed that for them....
....
so, today my plans are to catch up on homework...and that's really all i can afford to do today...
tomorrow will be church, which will be great for me....
monday it's back to class...i'll be glad when classes are done...i really need a break....
i haven't looked into next term's classes too much, but online registration starts on monday, and i'll be calling my advisor to go over what i will take...
i will (after this semester) only need 11 more credits for my associates in liberal arts...
how on earth did that happen?!...
also, so far i'm doing really well in both my classes and i think i will earn A's again this time around...if i can swing that for the last three classes as well, then my GPA would be at least 3.7 (what it is now) and that would mean i can graduate with some kind of honors i think...
....
graduate...that's a scary thought...
but if i go for my bachelors, i won't have to graduate right away... and that's a much happier thought....
i've never graduated from anything before....(well...kindergarden and the DARE program, if they really count...) so, the thought of a graduation ceremony...and getting a diploma...are really odd to me...
....
anyhow, i need to go catch up on homework....
have a great day, everyone...
-ramona anne
monday i went to class, like i always do...there were some things that were brought up in class that left me feeling really emotionally drained by the end of the evening...i left class and i ran into fran (a friend of mine who i have had for a few classes, and who teaches a class in the same building as my class, and during the same time frame...)
so we are talking and she could tell i wasn't my usual self...so she and i talked for a little while and then i went to go pick up my mom at my aunt's and she headed home...
the next morning i got a nice email from her, which really made my day start of on a brighter tone...then i went in to babysit...and of course, that was really good -- to be with the kids...(they do my heart such good...) ...
tuesday afternoon and evening was okay...i filled my bird feeders and spent some time outside, enjoying myself, although i wasn't really "happy" ... i mostly just coasted for the evening...
wednesday was a rough day....i felt off all day...it was greay and gloomy, which made a big difference, i think, in how i felt...
i was almost about 40 minutes late for home group, and even before i left the yard i was in a small fender bender accident...my brother (wo seems to be moving back in, and i am REALLY having a rough time with THAT....) has decided that he needs to work on his truck here, in our yard...but he doesn't have the money for the parts...so, his truck is just sitting in the yard...up on the jack, becuase the wheel is off....
it was dark and rainy wednesday evening...and, his truck hasn't been there that long, and i had forgotten it was there...
his truck is solid...and, i backed into it and crunched the fender....i don't know how much it's going to cost, but it will need to be repaired...i am VERY upset about this...
i didn't notice, though, that anything had been done to it, until yesterday....
so, i don't know what i should do -- call the insurance company, or just try to fix it myself somehow...
at any rate, i'm VERY upset...
....
thursday was better...my aunt & cousin came up and spent the night, and my cousin and i went to youth group...okay, i'm really technically too old for it...but because leah was with me i was able to stay and hang out, which was nice...
before we went to youth group, we all went to eat at tony's pizza and sub shop...i got myself a buffalo wrap, which i hadn't had in over a year...i forgot how addictive those things can be!...lol!!...
...
leah and i (and our moms of course!!) came home and leah and i stayed up until like, 2:00 in the morning talking...it was nice to catch up with her, though...
then we went to bed and i fell asleep pretty quickly....i woke up around 8:30-ish yesterday morning...
i started working on my project for next weekend's "experiencing the arts" class...i am going to share some of my photography...and share a bit on the history of photography, i guess...
after leah got up we hung out some but didn't go anywhere, which was fine...
we had a nice dinner (lunch) of corn chowder and grilled cheese and then hung out until the garage called to let my aunt know her car was ready (she came up to have work done on it here...)
so we took them down to the car, then my mom and i ran a few small/fast errands...we headed home and i was almost home when my friend moira called my cell phone and said her crew was home and i could head out to have supper (dinner) with them...
so, i dropped my mom off, grabbed a few things and headed out there and had a nice meal, walk, and visit...
they have two dogs who proved to be very entertaining when i started playing some bird calls on my iTunes on my laptop...that was hilarious...these two dogs would cock their heads from side to side and try to figure out where the sounds were coming from...it was too cute!!...
one of them even came right up to my laptop and was sniffing at it trying to figure it out...
my cat, on the other hand, could care less when i play my bird calls...
go figure...
....
that's about all the "news" for now...
i didn't get to bed until after 2:00 again this morning, but i slept in until about 10:20....
....
my brother came in while i was getting ready for bed, apparently with the intention of staying in his old room...i was upstairs and in my room in bed before he came up and he was REALLY upset because his bed had been stripped and the bedding was being washed...
(okay...keep in mind that he has moved out...he has not been here for months...)
the other two beds in that room had been freshly made up the night before for my aunt & cousin...you think he would have just climbed into one of those bed, right?...wrong...he had to turn the lights on and trash and crash and throw things around and swear and cuss and yell and make all this noise becuase he was angry because his bed had been stripped to wash teh sheets and blankets...
he just took some of the bedding off each of the beds, then threw what had been on his bed onto those other two beds, made his bed and slept there...
i'm very un-impressed with my brother right now for a number of reasons...
his behaviour last night was totally inappropriate and unacceptable...
i think with my next paycheck i'm going to buy a new doorknob so he can't pull any of those stunts anymore...
....
it'd be different if he was here for a few days until his truck would be fixed...but the thing is, he isn't even working on the truck....
soon the snow is going to come and the plow will need room to turn around...and if his truck stays where it is, the plow won't be able to come turn around...and we could end up having to shovel ourselves out...
the town has maintained this road forever -- and we're grandfathered into it....(besides, my mom is in her 70's and the town does take care of it's older residents...) but, if the plow can't turn around, i really don't think they'd be obligated to plow us out until we fixed that for them....
....
so, today my plans are to catch up on homework...and that's really all i can afford to do today...
tomorrow will be church, which will be great for me....
monday it's back to class...i'll be glad when classes are done...i really need a break....
i haven't looked into next term's classes too much, but online registration starts on monday, and i'll be calling my advisor to go over what i will take...
i will (after this semester) only need 11 more credits for my associates in liberal arts...
how on earth did that happen?!...
also, so far i'm doing really well in both my classes and i think i will earn A's again this time around...if i can swing that for the last three classes as well, then my GPA would be at least 3.7 (what it is now) and that would mean i can graduate with some kind of honors i think...
....
graduate...that's a scary thought...
but if i go for my bachelors, i won't have to graduate right away... and that's a much happier thought....
i've never graduated from anything before....(well...kindergarden and the DARE program, if they really count...) so, the thought of a graduation ceremony...and getting a diploma...are really odd to me...
....
anyhow, i need to go catch up on homework....
have a great day, everyone...
-ramona anne
Saturday, November 04, 2006
technology...hee hee...
so, i set up my new computer, and decided to use the norton anti-spam feature with my outlook express...THAT was a mistake....it has caused numerous issues with my outlook express...so, i disabled it and now outlook express is working fine...go me!!...
i got my pritner installed, and i've got everything set up...i'm using my old monitor (this comptuer didn't come with one) but that's fine anyways, because i love my 17 inch CRT monitor...
the only thing i'm not too crazy about is that the speakers that came with my old computer don't work when i plug them into the back of my new one where the speakers are supposed to go...
they do, however, work when i plug them into the headphone jack in front of the computer...
so i have sound...just not real loud sound (it is, after all, a headphone jack!) ...
...
the new mouse is a scroll mouse, which i am absolutely thrilled about!...
also, this has office 2003, which means i've got word, excel, and powerpoint...
i don't know if it's got access, but i don't really see myself needing access in the immediate future...
...
what i do see myself needing in the immediate future is a new mousepad (after ten years, they really should be replaced!..) ....
i also will need some printer paper...i've got about 12 sheets left or so...
...
i really am enjoying my new comptuer...it's so quiet, you can hardly tell it's running...what a difference over my old one!...
....
tonight i made supper for mom & i...it was one of those "i don't really know what i want" nights...so, i made some scrambled eggs with green pepper & onions mixed in...then we heated up some soft taco shells and put the egg stuff on that...added cheese, sour cream, and salsa and had egg burrito type things...it wasn't that bad, actually...
maybe not the healthiest meal, but we wanted something quick, easy, and different...
....
not too much else is going on right now...
i'm a few journal entries behind for my addictions class, i suppose i should get those typed up and printed, but i just feel like there's really only so much one person can really write about...
i will admit, the story on NPR's "all things considered" the last week in october about the dog who liked to lick toads was rather amusing and did make for a fun, lighter-hearted entry...
maybe i'll watch 28 days and write about that...she did say we could use movies for journal entries....
*hmm* a movie does sound kind of fun...
....
have a happy sunday, everyone!
-ramona anne
i got my pritner installed, and i've got everything set up...i'm using my old monitor (this comptuer didn't come with one) but that's fine anyways, because i love my 17 inch CRT monitor...
the only thing i'm not too crazy about is that the speakers that came with my old computer don't work when i plug them into the back of my new one where the speakers are supposed to go...
they do, however, work when i plug them into the headphone jack in front of the computer...
so i have sound...just not real loud sound (it is, after all, a headphone jack!) ...
...
the new mouse is a scroll mouse, which i am absolutely thrilled about!...
also, this has office 2003, which means i've got word, excel, and powerpoint...
i don't know if it's got access, but i don't really see myself needing access in the immediate future...
...
what i do see myself needing in the immediate future is a new mousepad (after ten years, they really should be replaced!..) ....
i also will need some printer paper...i've got about 12 sheets left or so...
...
i really am enjoying my new comptuer...it's so quiet, you can hardly tell it's running...what a difference over my old one!...
....
tonight i made supper for mom & i...it was one of those "i don't really know what i want" nights...so, i made some scrambled eggs with green pepper & onions mixed in...then we heated up some soft taco shells and put the egg stuff on that...added cheese, sour cream, and salsa and had egg burrito type things...it wasn't that bad, actually...
maybe not the healthiest meal, but we wanted something quick, easy, and different...
....
not too much else is going on right now...
i'm a few journal entries behind for my addictions class, i suppose i should get those typed up and printed, but i just feel like there's really only so much one person can really write about...
i will admit, the story on NPR's "all things considered" the last week in october about the dog who liked to lick toads was rather amusing and did make for a fun, lighter-hearted entry...
maybe i'll watch 28 days and write about that...she did say we could use movies for journal entries....
*hmm* a movie does sound kind of fun...
....
have a happy sunday, everyone!
-ramona anne
Friday, November 03, 2006
a new computer....
my current computer is about five years old...it's an hp pavillion 520w ... i love it...but, it's been acting up a bit lately...a little over a year ago, it's hard drive crashed -- totally -- and i lost like, pretty much everything....i had a 40 gig hard drive...
my uncle gave me a new hard drive which was an 18 gig...about half the size, but he just *gave* it to me and put it in for me and everything...and, it was free...so i really couldn't complain too much...
by the time i got windows XP put on there, it had 12 gigs free...a little over a year later, i'm down to about two gigs free, and it's starting to show signs of old age...
....
so today i did something slightly crazy...i went to mexico and got a new computer...
not mexico the country...(that would be funny, though!) ... mexico, maine ... it was about 62 miles, so 124 miles round trip....
...
i got an hp slimline s7410n .... it's got one gig of ram (quite a jump from 256!!) ... and a 250 gig hard drive...a dvd rw....and a multimedia center thingy...and uhm, a bunch of other stufff...
it's still in the box...i'll take it out tomorrow and play around with it, after i figure out waht i'll do with the stuff that's on my hard drive now...(i'm halfway through my semester here, i've got class stuff that i will need to transfer and things...of course, i do have a 512 MB jump drive...so if i could set my old system up in the bedroom upstairs, i could rather easily just move whole folders at a time, and save a lot of time and blank cd's!!...)
...
so, that'll be an ongoing project, i know...
at least now iv'e got something to do this weekend... :-)
...
after my mom & i got home we had supper and i went to visit a friend of mine and we caught up on things...we hadn't seen each other in a while, so it was very nice to visit with her...
....
i guess there's not too much else going on...
i'm sure i'll have lots more to talk about soon enough, though!!...
...
happy weekend to all,
-ramona anne
my uncle gave me a new hard drive which was an 18 gig...about half the size, but he just *gave* it to me and put it in for me and everything...and, it was free...so i really couldn't complain too much...
by the time i got windows XP put on there, it had 12 gigs free...a little over a year later, i'm down to about two gigs free, and it's starting to show signs of old age...
....
so today i did something slightly crazy...i went to mexico and got a new computer...
not mexico the country...(that would be funny, though!) ... mexico, maine ... it was about 62 miles, so 124 miles round trip....
...
i got an hp slimline s7410n .... it's got one gig of ram (quite a jump from 256!!) ... and a 250 gig hard drive...a dvd rw....and a multimedia center thingy...and uhm, a bunch of other stufff...
it's still in the box...i'll take it out tomorrow and play around with it, after i figure out waht i'll do with the stuff that's on my hard drive now...(i'm halfway through my semester here, i've got class stuff that i will need to transfer and things...of course, i do have a 512 MB jump drive...so if i could set my old system up in the bedroom upstairs, i could rather easily just move whole folders at a time, and save a lot of time and blank cd's!!...)
...
so, that'll be an ongoing project, i know...
at least now iv'e got something to do this weekend... :-)
...
after my mom & i got home we had supper and i went to visit a friend of mine and we caught up on things...we hadn't seen each other in a while, so it was very nice to visit with her...
....
i guess there's not too much else going on...
i'm sure i'll have lots more to talk about soon enough, though!!...
...
happy weekend to all,
-ramona anne
Thursday, November 02, 2006
my nephew joshua...
this adorable little guy is joshua...not the one i babysit, but the one i'm realted to (well, kind of) ... my brother, joe, married joshua's grandmother, ruth...ruth had a daughter from her first marriage who was named amy...amy was 26 when she lost a battle to cancer...joe and ruth were awarded custody of joshua...so, he's my brotehrs step-grandson/son...which basically makes him my great nephew...in my family we don't really do "step" relatives...if anyone asks i'll just say "he's my nephew"...isn't he absolutely adorable?...i love his bright blue eyes....
i know a couple of weeks ago, i had said i'd try to get a picture of him here on my blog...so, here he is...
today i got some films developed and for a couple bucks extra i could get the pictures on cd...i decided it would be neat to get that done...the only complaint i have with that is that the pictures are upside down...that's easy enough to fix, though...microsoft paint isn't a bad photo rotating and re-sizing program...it's what i used to edit this photo...all i did was re-size and turn right-side-up...easy enough, right?... :-)
....
today i babysat and ran some errands in the afternoon...there was about 1/2 an inch of wet sticky snow on the ground this morning when i got up...i was not happy....it's all melted now...and for that, i am glad!...however, i know it'll be here to stay soon enough...
....
also, today i ran into mr. martin -- he was my jr. high science teacher and he had been there for a while when i was there...he said he's still teaching...the guy must be in his 60's i'd say...he does love teaching, though...
it was nice to see him...
not too much else going on...i'm tired, so i guess this will be a short entry...
i may post more photos tomorrow...
stay tuned!...
-ramona anne
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
my last week...
i've been really busy this last week, and haven't really had much time to blog...last week i spent a whole afternoon after work just shopping...and how much did i spend?...about $35 ... really... just because i shop doesn't mean i always buy...i made the usual run to wal-mart for some things...well, i only needed one thing...i came out with more than i'd gone in for originally, but they were things that i knew i'd eventually need...like loose bird seed for my hanging feeder and a cake feeder for my big cage feeder...and yesterday i noticed that my small suet cake feeder is finally getting some activity...so, i'll probably get a new suet cake soon, too...
(oh, yeah...yesterday when i went to check the feeders, when i got down by the apple tree, i saw my cardinal was back, only this time he was ground feeding...i'm so happy!!...)
i also got a Christmas cd by johnny cash, and some other little things...
....
i've been busy of course with work and school, also...saturday i babysat all day and spent the night at the house of the lady i babysat for...sunday was church, of course, and then after church i came home and puttered mostly...it was a cold, windy, rainy/snowy, miserable day satuday and sunday both...monday i woke up to snow covering most of the yard...so, yeah, the weather's not been the best...
yesterday it was grey and gloomy and rainy, also, which was a big part of the reason i didn't get pictures of my birds at the feeder...
....
today it's absolutely beautiful...calm, sunny, bright, and warm...incredible weather for the first of november in nothern new hampshire!...
monday was kind of nice, too, just cold and windy...sunny, though, which can help make the wind and cold easier to deal with...i went to class in conway and a friend of mine (who is an instructor at the school) had some clothes she was looking to get rid of...she had told me to make room in the van...i thought "how much can there be, really?..." five boxes, that's how much...oh, well....some of it i've already gone through and there are some really neat things in there...maybe that'll be something i can do today, since i've got the day off... :-)
also monday in my class i got my essay back on the book "wasted" ... another A minus....from a teacher who rarely gives A's...needless to say, i was rather pleased!...
...
oh, and monday before i went down to class, i brought my resume and cover letter and transcripts in to the head start program...(they're looking for a classroom aide) ... and they interviewed me on the spot...i don't know if that's a good sign or not...but from what i understand there were not many people applying for that position anyways, so i guess i've got a good chance...
....
oh!...last week my brother took in a monarch chrysalis that he'd found somewhere outside...after we had gotten some snow and really cold frezing type weather...i thought "that poor thing won't make it..." when he took it in...and then i thought "well...maybe it will, if it's in here...i can give it a chance..." ...
it hatched yesterday...a beautiful male!...but, the wings are a little wrinkled, so i'm slightly concerned about that...but since today's such a beautiful day, i wouldn't be entirely surprised to find he's flown off (becuase he can fly...just not as strong as others i've seen...) ...
that was a really cool thing for me....
....
there's not too much else going on i guess...although i can't help but feel like i'm forgetting something...
oh, well, i'm sure i'll remember it later... :-)
have a great day, everyone!!
-ramona anne
(oh, yeah...yesterday when i went to check the feeders, when i got down by the apple tree, i saw my cardinal was back, only this time he was ground feeding...i'm so happy!!...)
i also got a Christmas cd by johnny cash, and some other little things...
....
i've been busy of course with work and school, also...saturday i babysat all day and spent the night at the house of the lady i babysat for...sunday was church, of course, and then after church i came home and puttered mostly...it was a cold, windy, rainy/snowy, miserable day satuday and sunday both...monday i woke up to snow covering most of the yard...so, yeah, the weather's not been the best...
yesterday it was grey and gloomy and rainy, also, which was a big part of the reason i didn't get pictures of my birds at the feeder...
....
today it's absolutely beautiful...calm, sunny, bright, and warm...incredible weather for the first of november in nothern new hampshire!...
monday was kind of nice, too, just cold and windy...sunny, though, which can help make the wind and cold easier to deal with...i went to class in conway and a friend of mine (who is an instructor at the school) had some clothes she was looking to get rid of...she had told me to make room in the van...i thought "how much can there be, really?..." five boxes, that's how much...oh, well....some of it i've already gone through and there are some really neat things in there...maybe that'll be something i can do today, since i've got the day off... :-)
also monday in my class i got my essay back on the book "wasted" ... another A minus....from a teacher who rarely gives A's...needless to say, i was rather pleased!...
...
oh, and monday before i went down to class, i brought my resume and cover letter and transcripts in to the head start program...(they're looking for a classroom aide) ... and they interviewed me on the spot...i don't know if that's a good sign or not...but from what i understand there were not many people applying for that position anyways, so i guess i've got a good chance...
....
oh!...last week my brother took in a monarch chrysalis that he'd found somewhere outside...after we had gotten some snow and really cold frezing type weather...i thought "that poor thing won't make it..." when he took it in...and then i thought "well...maybe it will, if it's in here...i can give it a chance..." ...
it hatched yesterday...a beautiful male!...but, the wings are a little wrinkled, so i'm slightly concerned about that...but since today's such a beautiful day, i wouldn't be entirely surprised to find he's flown off (becuase he can fly...just not as strong as others i've seen...) ...
that was a really cool thing for me....
....
there's not too much else going on i guess...although i can't help but feel like i'm forgetting something...
oh, well, i'm sure i'll remember it later... :-)
have a great day, everyone!!
-ramona anne
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
northern cardinals
this afternoon after i returned from babysitting and running a few other errands in town, i came home and noticed a bit of activity at my bird feeders...i came in the house and got my binoculars, as well as my camera, just in case...
imagine my sheer delight when i saw a beaufitul male northern cardinal at my feeder!!...i could hardly believe it!...in living here for 27 years, i've never seen one in the trees around my property...i guess it pays to feed the birds!!...
the image i shared here is one i found online....eventually, i'd like to be able to share my own!... :-)
....
also, here's a great link for some wonderful information and a few images and sound clips of cardinals (as well as pictures of a few look-alikes) ...http://www.birds.cornell.edu/BOW/norcar/
i absolutely love cardinals...i've only ever seen two others in real life before, and that was on a field trip out in maine for my bird ecology class...
so, seeing this one today really made this grey, gloomy day seem absolutely wonderful....
....
if anyone has any questions about cardinals or other birds, feel free to leave a comment...i'll try my best to answer them!!...
have a great day, everyone!!
-ramona anne
Thursday, October 26, 2006
how my monday went...
i would have posted yesterday, but i couldn't get on to blogger to post....
...
on monday i went to the doctors to go over the results of my PFT's...apparently i do have a lung disease, most likely asthma...that, combined with dust mite allergies, will cause me to have the problems i've been having...so that explains a lot....
after that, i came home and finished my reaction paper on "wasted" and kept a close eye on the snowfall outside...
i then headed down to class and picked up swan lake from a classmate from my other class so i can watch it and write a paper on that...
class went pretty well, we talked about wasted for most of the class, and the teacher let us out 15 minutes early, which i was glad about...
...
i then stopped in for a few minutes to talk to a friend who wants to set me up with a guy she knows...
i haven't made a decision yet as to wether i want to meet him or not...i probably will go through with it, because if nothing else he could end up becoming a really good friend...
...
tuesday was fun...i babysat, and had a great time with the kids...the oldest one wanted to spend a lot of time cuddling and snuggling, which i absolutely loved... :-)
....
wednesday was a fairly quiet day, i went to home group and had fun there...
...today (thursday) was a very, very quiet day...i stayed home and stayed in my pj's all day and did not much of anything...and it felt GREAT!!... :-)
....
one good thing that happened today: i slept in, and stayed in pj's all day... :-)
(hey, i gotta have a "pj day" once in a while!!...)
...
on monday i went to the doctors to go over the results of my PFT's...apparently i do have a lung disease, most likely asthma...that, combined with dust mite allergies, will cause me to have the problems i've been having...so that explains a lot....
after that, i came home and finished my reaction paper on "wasted" and kept a close eye on the snowfall outside...
i then headed down to class and picked up swan lake from a classmate from my other class so i can watch it and write a paper on that...
class went pretty well, we talked about wasted for most of the class, and the teacher let us out 15 minutes early, which i was glad about...
...
i then stopped in for a few minutes to talk to a friend who wants to set me up with a guy she knows...
i haven't made a decision yet as to wether i want to meet him or not...i probably will go through with it, because if nothing else he could end up becoming a really good friend...
...
tuesday was fun...i babysat, and had a great time with the kids...the oldest one wanted to spend a lot of time cuddling and snuggling, which i absolutely loved... :-)
....
wednesday was a fairly quiet day, i went to home group and had fun there...
...today (thursday) was a very, very quiet day...i stayed home and stayed in my pj's all day and did not much of anything...and it felt GREAT!!... :-)
....
one good thing that happened today: i slept in, and stayed in pj's all day... :-)
(hey, i gotta have a "pj day" once in a while!!...)
Tuesday, October 24, 2006
black capped chickadee
this adorable bird is a black capped chickadee...i had about ten of them in my yard and at my feeders today...(i also noticed blue jays and either a hairy or downy woodpecker, i didn't get a good enough look at the beak to figure out which it was...)
i figured since some people suggested i do a somewhat themed blog, and since i enjoy birds and bird watching, i would try to focus one of my blog entries per week on a bird of some sort...
today's bird is obviously the black capped chickadee...these birds are absolutely marvelous...they are year round residents in the freezing, snowy winters....just how does such a small bird survive such a long cold winter?...good question....it has to do with this amazing feature they have built in by God Himself...it's called "controlled hypothermia" .... these little birds will perch after feeding and will rest or fall asleep...eventually their body temperatures drop to an almost fatal level, and they will wake up, shiver and shake and puff their feathers out and bring their body temperatures back up to a healthy, more normal temperature....then they will settle in and go back to sleep...the body temperature eventually drops again, and they wake up and start the cycle all over again...
amazing, isn't it?...
chickadees are cavity nesters, usually found in a soft, rotting tree or stump ...a female chickadee will lay and incubate 6 to 8 white eggs which are finely dotted with reddish brown spots...the incubation time is 12 to 13 days....
is there anyhing else you'd like to know about the black capped chickadee?...leave a comment, and i'll try my best to find the answer for you... :-)
happy tuesday, everyone!!
-ramona anne
one good thing that happened today: definately it was seeing all the different birds at my feeder...
Monday, October 23, 2006
don't let it snow...
yesteday as my mom and i were heading north from enfield, the route we took home led us through franconia notch...there was snow in the notch...or, rather, it had snowed sometime between friday early evening and sunday early evening...(it was raining friday when we went through the notch, heading south...)
we made some jokes about the snow, and then i said "well, as long as it doesn't snow at home..."
....
we got home, unpacked, unwound some, had a quick supper and then headed to bed...(oh, when we got home we found a mouse sox had caught and snacked on and left the rest for us to see...ewww!!!....) ....
....
also, it started raining (again?!?!!?!!) when we got home yesterday....oh, well, it was rain, not snow....i wasn't going to complain too much, although i will admit i was slightly wooried about the possibility of flooding, as the rivers and streams have swollen almost to the limits of their capacities...
i went to bed, knowing that there wasn't anything i could do about it anyways, and said once again "at least it isn't snow..." ...
i woke up this morning and it was still raining...but, the rain was also accompanied by large, white, heavy-looking things falling from the sky...i rubbed my eyes, thinking maybe i wasn't seeing correctly...looked out my bedroom window again, and sure enough, there was snow mixed in with the rain...
"oh, well, nothing i can do about it" i said...i got up, and dubbed around and then got ready to head to my dr's appointment...it was a follow up on my allergy and PFT tests....i have a slight lung disease, basically a mild form of asthma....the dr. gave me a perscription for singulair and told me to keep doing what i'd been doing with the saline solution and stuff like that...
well, at least now i know i'm not dying or anything... ;-)
anyways, the snow is not really collecting here, but it was in berlin, which is kind of interesting...
actually, it seems to have stopped and now it appears to have switched back over to rain, which is better, i guess, than snow...just as long as we don't get too much and it causes flooding...
anyhow...i need to go finish my homework for class tonight...
have a good day, everyone...
-ramona anne
one good thing that happened today: it stopped snowing!! yay!!...
we made some jokes about the snow, and then i said "well, as long as it doesn't snow at home..."
....
we got home, unpacked, unwound some, had a quick supper and then headed to bed...(oh, when we got home we found a mouse sox had caught and snacked on and left the rest for us to see...ewww!!!....) ....
....
also, it started raining (again?!?!!?!!) when we got home yesterday....oh, well, it was rain, not snow....i wasn't going to complain too much, although i will admit i was slightly wooried about the possibility of flooding, as the rivers and streams have swollen almost to the limits of their capacities...
i went to bed, knowing that there wasn't anything i could do about it anyways, and said once again "at least it isn't snow..." ...
i woke up this morning and it was still raining...but, the rain was also accompanied by large, white, heavy-looking things falling from the sky...i rubbed my eyes, thinking maybe i wasn't seeing correctly...looked out my bedroom window again, and sure enough, there was snow mixed in with the rain...
"oh, well, nothing i can do about it" i said...i got up, and dubbed around and then got ready to head to my dr's appointment...it was a follow up on my allergy and PFT tests....i have a slight lung disease, basically a mild form of asthma....the dr. gave me a perscription for singulair and told me to keep doing what i'd been doing with the saline solution and stuff like that...
well, at least now i know i'm not dying or anything... ;-)
anyways, the snow is not really collecting here, but it was in berlin, which is kind of interesting...
actually, it seems to have stopped and now it appears to have switched back over to rain, which is better, i guess, than snow...just as long as we don't get too much and it causes flooding...
anyhow...i need to go finish my homework for class tonight...
have a good day, everyone...
-ramona anne
one good thing that happened today: it stopped snowing!! yay!!...
Sunday, October 22, 2006
what's bruin, deer?...
yesterday, before the family gathering, my mom & i ran out to west lebanon to get some things...i stopped in at borders and spent around $80...it's not often i go in there, so i guess that wasn't really a terrible thing...
i left the store and went to the vehicle for a little while and waited for my mom...i wanted to get some film, and we were going to drive to wal-mart to get that after....well, i decided to try and get the film at the grocery store where she was to save a trip and some time....so i slip into the store and find the film right away, because i've gotten film there before...well, you could get a great deal on it with a card, and my mom had my aunt's card, so i'm trying to find her....half an hour later, i gave up and decided to just go pay for my few purchaces...turned out that we had missed each other coming in and going out of the store....
well, i get out to the car (the lady behind me had let me swipe her savings card...) and go to start the car...i hear a "click, click, click, click..." i said "mom...the battery's dead..." she said "no it's not, the car's already running...i had the keys on..."
so, i turned the keys off, pulled them out, and put them back in and tried yet again to start the car...same thing -- rapid clicking and no turning over of the engine....
i said "see, mom...i told you, the battery's dead..."
half an hour on auxillary drained the battery...
so, i make a call to the house and my aunt elaine says she'll send her brother, my uncle frank, out to rescue us...
mom & i wait for him and just as he's pulling into the lot, this gentlemen in the vehicle next to us is getting ready to leave...i asked him if he'd be willing to hold that parking spot so my uncle could park next to us to give us a boost...he was willing to do that, and i ran to catch up with my uncle (orange croc's and all...hee hee!!...) and told him where to go and things...
so the man pulled out and there was someone who i could tell wanted that parking spot, but i stood there until my uncle could get in....
so, we get the car started right away, then we drive down to springfield to get joe & joshua...we go in to see them and shasta was thrilled as anything to see me...she even tried getting in my lap...(i absolutely love that dog, for that very reason!!...) she was happy and smiling and i was so glad to have seen her... :-)
we head back to the house in enfield and we had a great time at the gathering...three of mom's cousins showed up, and i got to visit with them...and i visited with a lot of my aunts & uncles and cousins, and two of my brothers...and of course there were kids here, which was great!...
there was plenty of great food, and of course, great company...i really enjoyed myself...
....
well, it came time to bring joe & joshua home, and we turn down this one road and i'm in the middle of telling a story about a moose accident i was the first on the scene for earlier this summer...(i saw the moose, but not the vehicle that hit it, at first...turned the bend and there's an 18 wheeler pulled off to the side of the road...there's a whole story about it that i may share here soon...)
well, we get around the bend and a lone coyote was on the side of the road, and it decided to cross the road right about then...so we got to see it do that, and since we had a 6 year old in the vehicle with us, and since the coyote really only ran to the other side of the road, we decided to pull off so we could all get a better look....it was amazing, because i rarely see them...
after we dropped joe and josh off at home, we headed back here to enfield...on the way back, i saw a very large black bear, which was nice...it's the second one i've seen this year....we also saw two absolutely stunning white tailed deer....
it was certainly a treat to see those animals!....
there were no moose to be seen (i know linda would probably wonder about that!!...) but that was just fine with me...
.....
on today's agenda : have breakfast, shower, read more in "wasted"...pack the car up, go back home, finish "wasted" and write out the essay on it....
tomorrow is back to class and my normal life and routine....i'm kind of looking forward to that...
....
i had three very odd dreams last night...one that i will share -- i was somewhere in a class and we were having to share a piece of poetry we liked or something...and this girl gets up and starts reading "my name is mary magdeline...i come from palestine....please excuse these rags i'm in, i've fallen on hard times..."
and i was like "hey...it's the ballad of mary magdeline!...." and so this girl and i were talking and we got into a great discussion about folk music....it was neat...
i also had a weird dream about using a wooden-stalled toilet, which was very, very odd....oh, and also in that dream there was something going on and there was a tv show that some young kids were running and stuff...
i also had a dream about having shared something with someone in particular and she was going to give me a hug and talk to me about it...but only she wanted to take me somewhere special to talk, and we were kind of like in the top floor of this building and i guess there were like a lot of people up there, so she said "let's go somewhere quieter..." and we kept going down all these flights of stairs and we finally get to where i think we're going to talk, and then we leave the building...the door closes and locks behind us, and we realize it's really cold outside, and all or our things are still inside....
it was kind of odd....
....
anyhow...i think i'm gonna go get something for breakfast...someone is making toast with the home made bread here, and it's smelling very, very delicious!!...
....
have a happy sunday, everyone!!!
-ramona anne
i left the store and went to the vehicle for a little while and waited for my mom...i wanted to get some film, and we were going to drive to wal-mart to get that after....well, i decided to try and get the film at the grocery store where she was to save a trip and some time....so i slip into the store and find the film right away, because i've gotten film there before...well, you could get a great deal on it with a card, and my mom had my aunt's card, so i'm trying to find her....half an hour later, i gave up and decided to just go pay for my few purchaces...turned out that we had missed each other coming in and going out of the store....
well, i get out to the car (the lady behind me had let me swipe her savings card...) and go to start the car...i hear a "click, click, click, click..." i said "mom...the battery's dead..." she said "no it's not, the car's already running...i had the keys on..."
so, i turned the keys off, pulled them out, and put them back in and tried yet again to start the car...same thing -- rapid clicking and no turning over of the engine....
i said "see, mom...i told you, the battery's dead..."
half an hour on auxillary drained the battery...
so, i make a call to the house and my aunt elaine says she'll send her brother, my uncle frank, out to rescue us...
mom & i wait for him and just as he's pulling into the lot, this gentlemen in the vehicle next to us is getting ready to leave...i asked him if he'd be willing to hold that parking spot so my uncle could park next to us to give us a boost...he was willing to do that, and i ran to catch up with my uncle (orange croc's and all...hee hee!!...) and told him where to go and things...
so the man pulled out and there was someone who i could tell wanted that parking spot, but i stood there until my uncle could get in....
so, we get the car started right away, then we drive down to springfield to get joe & joshua...we go in to see them and shasta was thrilled as anything to see me...she even tried getting in my lap...(i absolutely love that dog, for that very reason!!...) she was happy and smiling and i was so glad to have seen her... :-)
we head back to the house in enfield and we had a great time at the gathering...three of mom's cousins showed up, and i got to visit with them...and i visited with a lot of my aunts & uncles and cousins, and two of my brothers...and of course there were kids here, which was great!...
there was plenty of great food, and of course, great company...i really enjoyed myself...
....
well, it came time to bring joe & joshua home, and we turn down this one road and i'm in the middle of telling a story about a moose accident i was the first on the scene for earlier this summer...(i saw the moose, but not the vehicle that hit it, at first...turned the bend and there's an 18 wheeler pulled off to the side of the road...there's a whole story about it that i may share here soon...)
well, we get around the bend and a lone coyote was on the side of the road, and it decided to cross the road right about then...so we got to see it do that, and since we had a 6 year old in the vehicle with us, and since the coyote really only ran to the other side of the road, we decided to pull off so we could all get a better look....it was amazing, because i rarely see them...
after we dropped joe and josh off at home, we headed back here to enfield...on the way back, i saw a very large black bear, which was nice...it's the second one i've seen this year....we also saw two absolutely stunning white tailed deer....
it was certainly a treat to see those animals!....
there were no moose to be seen (i know linda would probably wonder about that!!...) but that was just fine with me...
.....
on today's agenda : have breakfast, shower, read more in "wasted"...pack the car up, go back home, finish "wasted" and write out the essay on it....
tomorrow is back to class and my normal life and routine....i'm kind of looking forward to that...
....
i had three very odd dreams last night...one that i will share -- i was somewhere in a class and we were having to share a piece of poetry we liked or something...and this girl gets up and starts reading "my name is mary magdeline...i come from palestine....please excuse these rags i'm in, i've fallen on hard times..."
and i was like "hey...it's the ballad of mary magdeline!...." and so this girl and i were talking and we got into a great discussion about folk music....it was neat...
i also had a weird dream about using a wooden-stalled toilet, which was very, very odd....oh, and also in that dream there was something going on and there was a tv show that some young kids were running and stuff...
i also had a dream about having shared something with someone in particular and she was going to give me a hug and talk to me about it...but only she wanted to take me somewhere special to talk, and we were kind of like in the top floor of this building and i guess there were like a lot of people up there, so she said "let's go somewhere quieter..." and we kept going down all these flights of stairs and we finally get to where i think we're going to talk, and then we leave the building...the door closes and locks behind us, and we realize it's really cold outside, and all or our things are still inside....
it was kind of odd....
....
anyhow...i think i'm gonna go get something for breakfast...someone is making toast with the home made bread here, and it's smelling very, very delicious!!...
....
have a happy sunday, everyone!!!
-ramona anne
Saturday, October 21, 2006
bugs, rainy days, and cookies?...
yesterday on the way down to the house in enfield, we stopped at the coos county extention office....i had a weird bug i wanted identified....there have been many of these bugs hanging out around my house and some other houses and places i've been lately, and i finally caugt one and took it out to be identified...it's a western conifer seed bug...relatively harmless, i think...but it's amazing how many of them i've seen this year.... this is what they look like, although the coloration has been known to vary slightly...you can google image them and see what i mean...some have more brown than this one here...
they're harmless, just kind of a annoyance for those folks who aren't overly fond of bugs...they're classified as stink bugs, as i learned from this website here...(it's also where i got the image...)
of course, the county extention office is also home of the county's 4H operations...usually the first (or second??) week in october is their yearly fundraising endavor...this equals sales of cookies and candy bars...
cookies and candy bars that don't get sold apparently get returned to the county office....i happened to notice some yesterday, and got very excited because the lady at the extention office told me i could buy some if i wanted....
the selection wasn't the greatest, but they had my favourite and my mom's favourite, so really, that's all that mattered... :-)
also, i bought a few of the candy bars, too....
i miss 4H...i was a member of it for ten plus years, starting before i could really be considered a "cloverbud" ... maybe when things settle down in my life some, i'll consider being a 4H leader...
....
yesterday it rained almost all day...the whole trip to enfield was rainy...some parts were terribly windy as well...and during some parts of the trip, the visibility was so poor that i really had to strain my eyes to see much beyond the front of the vehicle...
what is usually a 2 to 2 & 1/2 hour trip took almost 4 hours...i was so glad to get to the house in enfield, and to be safe, warm, and dry....
....
today is the fall family gathering...my brother joe will be here with his (grand)son, joshua...who is just the most beautiful little boy, and who i absolutely adore...joshua's mother passed away after a long battle with cancer, and so joe & ruth (my sister in law) adopted him...he's a great kid, and i love him so much...i'll try and get a few pictures of him on here one of these days...
....
today before the gathering, i need to run out to west lebanon and grab a few things at borders...(is there such thing as a "quick stop" at borders?...today there will have to be....) i need to get a new copy of anne lamont's "traveling mercies" ... i seem to have misplaced (or maybe loaned out??) my copy, so i need another one...
i also need to see if they have a few books that i've been looking for...the phantom tollbooth for one...mayra hornbacher's "wasted" with the PS, because i'd really like to know what happened after the book was published....and apparently she wrote a novel called "the center of winter" which seems like it may be good reading....
i also think i'd like to get the DVD of a prairie home companion, but it's slightly possible that wal-mart carries it and may have it for a little less....
....
anyways, i should go....i've gotta get ready to head out to west lebanon and then mom & i are cruising down to springfield to get my brother joe & josh....ruth has the car for work, and joe would like to come today, so we're gonna go get the two of them...
aww, joe has this awesome dog named shasta....she is a chocolate lab and she's almost constantly smiling...she just loves life...it'll be nice to see her again...
she's the only dog we've had in my house that didn't get in a fight with my cat, sox...sox wanted to let shasta know she wasn't welcome...shasta just ignored her...for a whole week (we dog sat when joe & ruth went on their honeymoon...) ... it was great!!...sox would growl, and hiss, and make all these sounds...and shasta would just look at her like "what are you complaining about?..." but then she decided to just ignore the cat all together...sox eventually learned that shasta wasn't going to hurt her, and that she just had to accept the fact that shasta was there....
....
have a super day, everyone!!
-ramona anne
one good thing that happened today: well, it's too early to really tell, but i know i'm gonna love the gathering...these things are so important to me...i greatly value my extended family....
Friday, October 20, 2006
it's a small world...
last week i talked about having a "small world" story to share...i guess it's about time i shared it...
last week, after home group, a few people were talking, and there's this one lady who is "new-ish" to the area...she was talking to one of the other ladies from church and she mentioned something about "well, i went to the cambridge vineyard before it was THE cambridge vineyard..."
my ears perked up...i said "cambridge mass?..." and she says to me "yeah...cambridge mass..."
i said to her "i know that's probably a big church, but do you happen to know a guy named tigre?...or ti ti?..." she said "yeah, i knew a ti ti...we used to do street ministry together..." i said "he's tall, slender, and he's got nice long dark hair?..." she said "yeah...that's the ti ti i know..."
i squealed and was SOOO excited....
it's funny, i had been thinking of ti ti for a couple of week, wondering what was up with him...(i even asked on an online email discussion list if anyone knew his contact info, and ti ti himself replied, which was great!...) ....
but, anyways, this friend of mine knew ti ti and then she said "wait...how do you know him?..." and i told her "through an email discussion list...and we've met a few times in person..."
it was really cool, though....
she said "if he only knew where i was living now, he would probably be very shocked...i was like the urban goddess, and now here i am in the middle of northern, nh with moose for visitors...."
but, yeah, it was a pretty cool thing...
and ti ti -- if you're reading this... moria says hi... :-D
....
my plans for today are to finish packing and get ready to head to enfield for the weekend...this time for a family gathering...(i was down there last weekend for classes) ... i'm kind of excited about that, i really do enjoy the family gatherings...
so i'm actually going to go do said packing and finish getting ready....i'm not sure if i'll blog much this weekend, but i'll try...
i'll certainly resume after the weekend... :-)
one good thing that happened today: i got an awesome comment from warren, who really seems to get it... (thanks, warren!) ...of course, he listens to mark heard, so he WOULD get it...
....
have a great weekend, everyone!!
-ramona anne
last week, after home group, a few people were talking, and there's this one lady who is "new-ish" to the area...she was talking to one of the other ladies from church and she mentioned something about "well, i went to the cambridge vineyard before it was THE cambridge vineyard..."
my ears perked up...i said "cambridge mass?..." and she says to me "yeah...cambridge mass..."
i said to her "i know that's probably a big church, but do you happen to know a guy named tigre?...or ti ti?..." she said "yeah, i knew a ti ti...we used to do street ministry together..." i said "he's tall, slender, and he's got nice long dark hair?..." she said "yeah...that's the ti ti i know..."
i squealed and was SOOO excited....
it's funny, i had been thinking of ti ti for a couple of week, wondering what was up with him...(i even asked on an online email discussion list if anyone knew his contact info, and ti ti himself replied, which was great!...) ....
but, anyways, this friend of mine knew ti ti and then she said "wait...how do you know him?..." and i told her "through an email discussion list...and we've met a few times in person..."
it was really cool, though....
she said "if he only knew where i was living now, he would probably be very shocked...i was like the urban goddess, and now here i am in the middle of northern, nh with moose for visitors...."
but, yeah, it was a pretty cool thing...
and ti ti -- if you're reading this... moria says hi... :-D
....
my plans for today are to finish packing and get ready to head to enfield for the weekend...this time for a family gathering...(i was down there last weekend for classes) ... i'm kind of excited about that, i really do enjoy the family gatherings...
so i'm actually going to go do said packing and finish getting ready....i'm not sure if i'll blog much this weekend, but i'll try...
i'll certainly resume after the weekend... :-)
one good thing that happened today: i got an awesome comment from warren, who really seems to get it... (thanks, warren!) ...of course, he listens to mark heard, so he WOULD get it...
....
have a great weekend, everyone!!
-ramona anne
Thursday, October 19, 2006
why i blog what i do...(and don't!)
well, my last post earned a couple of comments, which is cool...and now to address said comments...
i realize this is a "personal blog" ... and i suppose i could make it better by posting about politics, economics and the like...but the truth is, i don't generally discuss those things in my normal every day life...
...
and to focus my posts on one specific thing feels almost too limiting to me in a way...
if i were to just write all the time about a specific topic (sports, politics, what have you) then i would certainly feel like only a small part of me would be shown...only one side...and i might eventually feel like iw as shallow or something...
there are so many things in life that just absolutely blow me away...i can find the most ordinary things to also be the most inspirational ...
maybe eventually my blog will take on a bit more of a "themed entry" type of format...maybe i'll make one day of the week special for just sharing a song i like, or something along those lines...maybe i'll make one day a week "share a photo" day....and maybe one day a week could be "bird day" or something...i guess that would make my blog be a little more "focused" in a sense...
so, to the two folks who left comments (thank you!!) what do you think of that idea?...it's still showing/sharing a little bit of my interests, but it's also giving them a certain day to shine, so to speak...
what do some of my other readers think about this idea?...
....
i'm a simple person, for the most part...really...i have a part time job and i'm going back to college...i live in northern new hampshire where we have four seasons...i live in a town of 300-something people...the population density is something like 6.2 people per square mile...i love living here...
i'm really not as "informed" as i should be as a "good citizen" ... but things really are different around where i live....it truly is a different way of life...
so, maybe that's part of the reason i stay away from some certain topics in my blog posts...
my "world" is much different than that of probably many of the readers out there...
....
anyways, i guess that might be about all for now...
happy thursday everyone,
-ramona anne
one good thing that happened today: i noticed a fairly good sized flock of american robins on the side yard...about 15 to 20 of them...it's the time of year when they have stopped being so aggressive and territorial, and they are starting to form their "feeding colonies" .... this of course means that winter will soon be here, which i'm not exactly happy about...but, it's nice to see the robins like that...they don't migrate in the sense that one would think -- they actually usually just go deeper into the woods and stick close together...i don't think a lot of people realize that...they say spring is here when they see the robins have returned...but the robins never really left in the first place...we learned about that in my bird ecology class this spring...
i realize this is a "personal blog" ... and i suppose i could make it better by posting about politics, economics and the like...but the truth is, i don't generally discuss those things in my normal every day life...
...
and to focus my posts on one specific thing feels almost too limiting to me in a way...
if i were to just write all the time about a specific topic (sports, politics, what have you) then i would certainly feel like only a small part of me would be shown...only one side...and i might eventually feel like iw as shallow or something...
there are so many things in life that just absolutely blow me away...i can find the most ordinary things to also be the most inspirational ...
maybe eventually my blog will take on a bit more of a "themed entry" type of format...maybe i'll make one day of the week special for just sharing a song i like, or something along those lines...maybe i'll make one day a week "share a photo" day....and maybe one day a week could be "bird day" or something...i guess that would make my blog be a little more "focused" in a sense...
so, to the two folks who left comments (thank you!!) what do you think of that idea?...it's still showing/sharing a little bit of my interests, but it's also giving them a certain day to shine, so to speak...
what do some of my other readers think about this idea?...
....
i'm a simple person, for the most part...really...i have a part time job and i'm going back to college...i live in northern new hampshire where we have four seasons...i live in a town of 300-something people...the population density is something like 6.2 people per square mile...i love living here...
i'm really not as "informed" as i should be as a "good citizen" ... but things really are different around where i live....it truly is a different way of life...
so, maybe that's part of the reason i stay away from some certain topics in my blog posts...
my "world" is much different than that of probably many of the readers out there...
....
anyways, i guess that might be about all for now...
happy thursday everyone,
-ramona anne
one good thing that happened today: i noticed a fairly good sized flock of american robins on the side yard...about 15 to 20 of them...it's the time of year when they have stopped being so aggressive and territorial, and they are starting to form their "feeding colonies" .... this of course means that winter will soon be here, which i'm not exactly happy about...but, it's nice to see the robins like that...they don't migrate in the sense that one would think -- they actually usually just go deeper into the woods and stick close together...i don't think a lot of people realize that...they say spring is here when they see the robins have returned...but the robins never really left in the first place...we learned about that in my bird ecology class this spring...
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
is anyone out there?
i'm really starting to wonder if anyone really reads this blog...i've gotten one commet in about a month of blogging, and it was from someone who i didn't even know...
so the big question in my mind is "who is out there reading this?..." and also i wonder "is anyone even reading this?..." ...
if you are reading this, i'd love some feedback now & then...if there's something you'd like me to write about or share my opinion on, feel free to leave a message...if there's a question you're dying to know about me, leave a message....if i find it's one i'm comfortable answering on my blog, then i'll certainly answer it...
...
today it's been grey and rainy all day, and i've been wasting time all afternoon...i have to head out soon for home fellowship group, and i'm way behind in my reading for class monday...so, i guess i know what i'll be doing the rest of this week....
i feel like crud today -- my chest hurts from the breathing test yesterday, and i just want to sleep...(i think it's the grey/rainy weather that's causing that, really...)
this morning i did enjoy babysitting, though...i took a few pictures of the kids, which came out pretty good, i think...i'm rahter unimpressed with my current digital camera, though, and i think i want to get something a little better, eventually...
i also need to get some film for my canon rebel...it's 35 to 80 mm zoom lens, which is a decent camera for pictures when i'm just "goofing around" so to speak...eventually i also want to get a better/longer lens for that...i imagine with a better lens, i can get some even better shots than those which i've taken already...
....
anyhow...i'm off to go do something else...i may update later, i ma not...it will depend on how i feel when i get home tonight...
one good thing that happened today: i did get about a chapter's worth of reading done in "wasted" ... i've still got a lot to go, though!!...
happy wednesday, everyone...
-ramona anne
so the big question in my mind is "who is out there reading this?..." and also i wonder "is anyone even reading this?..." ...
if you are reading this, i'd love some feedback now & then...if there's something you'd like me to write about or share my opinion on, feel free to leave a message...if there's a question you're dying to know about me, leave a message....if i find it's one i'm comfortable answering on my blog, then i'll certainly answer it...
...
today it's been grey and rainy all day, and i've been wasting time all afternoon...i have to head out soon for home fellowship group, and i'm way behind in my reading for class monday...so, i guess i know what i'll be doing the rest of this week....
i feel like crud today -- my chest hurts from the breathing test yesterday, and i just want to sleep...(i think it's the grey/rainy weather that's causing that, really...)
this morning i did enjoy babysitting, though...i took a few pictures of the kids, which came out pretty good, i think...i'm rahter unimpressed with my current digital camera, though, and i think i want to get something a little better, eventually...
i also need to get some film for my canon rebel...it's 35 to 80 mm zoom lens, which is a decent camera for pictures when i'm just "goofing around" so to speak...eventually i also want to get a better/longer lens for that...i imagine with a better lens, i can get some even better shots than those which i've taken already...
....
anyhow...i'm off to go do something else...i may update later, i ma not...it will depend on how i feel when i get home tonight...
one good thing that happened today: i did get about a chapter's worth of reading done in "wasted" ... i've still got a lot to go, though!!...
happy wednesday, everyone...
-ramona anne
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
sometimes i feel like this guy here...
sometimes i feel like this guy here ... the one holding the bug in the jar, i guess... (other times i feel like the other guy, too, though...)
http://www.explodingdog.com/october24/hug.html ... "i just want a hug" .... yeah...that's how i feel so much of the time...
....
i feel so disconnected sometimes, and so un-real ... not un-real as in fake or pretensious...un-real as in sometimes i feel like i don't even exist...i feel like i'm not really here...i don't feel any connetions to anything, really, and i just feel like i'm "out there"...like i'm just a figment of someone's imaginaton or something...and i feel like at any second i just won't exist anymore...and that nobody will even realize i've gone away...
and that almost makes me feel like crying...
....
also, sometimes, i'll feel so very hurt, but i don't let people know...i'll be having a really bad day, and nobody will even know...(but there are a few (very few!) people who can see through my best and strongest defenses, and i am so thankful for them...) ...
all that to say -- today, i'm having a weird day...i'm torn between feeling hurt and feeling like i'm part of someone's imagination....and i'm hurting so much today, i really am...and all i feel like i want is to just not exist anymore...to not be here...and again, i almost want to cry...maybe not so much because of the hurt...but because i feel like i just don't want to be here, and i'm afraid of that...i'm VERY afraid of that...
....
you see...something took place yesterday and it was a sort of innocent thing, i'm sure, but there was something that was said by a friend of mine that just triggered a whole flood of memories....
i know this person probably has no clue how i'm feeling (and do they even care, really?...i think they might, and i'm sure if they knew what was happening with me, they might try to help me feel better...but i guess you just really never know, do you?....) .... anyways, they said something...
and there was this one little word in a sentence...and it hit me like a ton of bricks...and i cringed, and i closed my eyes for a moment, and i wished with all my heart that i hadn't heard that word...and i knew then that i would have a rough day -- emotionally speaking -- today...
my back was to her when she said what she did...i was on the way to put my stuff in my mom's van after class...i guess i'm thankful for that, because i know that my face would have given away a lot more than i would have felt comfortable letting someone see....even someone who cares about me like she says she does...
it seems like just when you think you're "all set" with certain things, something comes up and damn it all, there it is again....
i hate that i still remember certain things...(and i hate that there are some pleasant things that i've forgotten...) ...
i hate that i still am not "over it"...or "healed from it"... or whatever i should be....
...
and i know i've come a long way...but i see now that i also still have a ways to go....
....
anyways, it was a weird kind of day for me today...
....
in other "normal" day-to-day news -- i had bloodwork and my breathing test today...apparently the guy seemed to think everything was "okay" and "normal" but i'll have an appointment next week with the ENT specialist to go over everything....i guess we'll see...
also, today i was going to run something into the church office at my mom's church and this guy pulled up like, right behind me and asked me if the pastor was around...i said "i don't know?...i don't come to church here...i'm just bringing something into the church office for my mom..." and he said "well, i need to talk to the pastor, i'm almost out of gas, and i need some money..." i said "well, maybe if you go in?..." and he said "i'm in a wheelchair, i can't go in..." i said "well...i don't know what to tell you?..." and he asked if i could go see if he was there...so i said i could do that...
the priest wasn't in, and so i had to go back and tell that guy and he was obviously angry or upset about something...and he was almost like, taking it out on me...as if i had anything to do with anything?!...then he mentioned that he needed gas money to get to manchester and that he couldn't stay anywhere tonight so he had to go to manchester...and i said "i'm really sorry, i can't help you..."
it was just really odd, though....in lots of ways...
....
i guess that's about all for now...i'm really tired, and i think i want to go relax for a while....i babysat josh & abby today...i really love those kids...i'm going to watch thgem again tomorrow and thursday, which will be nice, and it'll be a little more money in my pocket, which is never a bad thing....
until next time...
-ramona anne
http://www.explodingdog.com/october24/hug.html ... "i just want a hug" .... yeah...that's how i feel so much of the time...
....
i feel so disconnected sometimes, and so un-real ... not un-real as in fake or pretensious...un-real as in sometimes i feel like i don't even exist...i feel like i'm not really here...i don't feel any connetions to anything, really, and i just feel like i'm "out there"...like i'm just a figment of someone's imaginaton or something...and i feel like at any second i just won't exist anymore...and that nobody will even realize i've gone away...
and that almost makes me feel like crying...
....
also, sometimes, i'll feel so very hurt, but i don't let people know...i'll be having a really bad day, and nobody will even know...(but there are a few (very few!) people who can see through my best and strongest defenses, and i am so thankful for them...) ...
all that to say -- today, i'm having a weird day...i'm torn between feeling hurt and feeling like i'm part of someone's imagination....and i'm hurting so much today, i really am...and all i feel like i want is to just not exist anymore...to not be here...and again, i almost want to cry...maybe not so much because of the hurt...but because i feel like i just don't want to be here, and i'm afraid of that...i'm VERY afraid of that...
....
you see...something took place yesterday and it was a sort of innocent thing, i'm sure, but there was something that was said by a friend of mine that just triggered a whole flood of memories....
i know this person probably has no clue how i'm feeling (and do they even care, really?...i think they might, and i'm sure if they knew what was happening with me, they might try to help me feel better...but i guess you just really never know, do you?....) .... anyways, they said something...
and there was this one little word in a sentence...and it hit me like a ton of bricks...and i cringed, and i closed my eyes for a moment, and i wished with all my heart that i hadn't heard that word...and i knew then that i would have a rough day -- emotionally speaking -- today...
my back was to her when she said what she did...i was on the way to put my stuff in my mom's van after class...i guess i'm thankful for that, because i know that my face would have given away a lot more than i would have felt comfortable letting someone see....even someone who cares about me like she says she does...
it seems like just when you think you're "all set" with certain things, something comes up and damn it all, there it is again....
i hate that i still remember certain things...(and i hate that there are some pleasant things that i've forgotten...) ...
i hate that i still am not "over it"...or "healed from it"... or whatever i should be....
...
and i know i've come a long way...but i see now that i also still have a ways to go....
....
anyways, it was a weird kind of day for me today...
....
in other "normal" day-to-day news -- i had bloodwork and my breathing test today...apparently the guy seemed to think everything was "okay" and "normal" but i'll have an appointment next week with the ENT specialist to go over everything....i guess we'll see...
also, today i was going to run something into the church office at my mom's church and this guy pulled up like, right behind me and asked me if the pastor was around...i said "i don't know?...i don't come to church here...i'm just bringing something into the church office for my mom..." and he said "well, i need to talk to the pastor, i'm almost out of gas, and i need some money..." i said "well, maybe if you go in?..." and he said "i'm in a wheelchair, i can't go in..." i said "well...i don't know what to tell you?..." and he asked if i could go see if he was there...so i said i could do that...
the priest wasn't in, and so i had to go back and tell that guy and he was obviously angry or upset about something...and he was almost like, taking it out on me...as if i had anything to do with anything?!...then he mentioned that he needed gas money to get to manchester and that he couldn't stay anywhere tonight so he had to go to manchester...and i said "i'm really sorry, i can't help you..."
it was just really odd, though....in lots of ways...
....
i guess that's about all for now...i'm really tired, and i think i want to go relax for a while....i babysat josh & abby today...i really love those kids...i'm going to watch thgem again tomorrow and thursday, which will be nice, and it'll be a little more money in my pocket, which is never a bad thing....
until next time...
-ramona anne
it's technically "tomorrow"...
it's actually after midnight, but i wanted to blog a bit before bed...
as you all have noticed from yesterday's post, i've really been digging the tune "stones in the road" lately...
today on the way to class, i was listening to that song and i was driving near the post office in town, and this little boy was walking where the sidewalk used to be before they tore it up for all the construction...my mom was driving, so i king of watched this little boy for a moment or two...he was walking and then he stopped and stooped down and gathered some of the stones in his hand and was looking at them...he had on a warm-looking red jacket and he had this beautifully messed up blonde hair....the typical image of an all american kid...
and the lines that were playing when this boy was doing this were
"And the stones in the road shone like diamonds in the dust
And then a voice called to us to make our way back home"
i thought "how beautiful of a thing that was that just happened"...it was like serendepity or something....
i wondered, what the little boy might go "home" to, though, and i started thinking about how much things have changed in today's society even from the time i was that little boy's age to what it's like for children now...in 20 years things have changed oh so very much, it's downright scary at times....
....
anyhow, i'm tired, and i despreately need sleep...i'm babysitting later today (it is after midnight, you know!!...) ... and then i've got some medical appointments...so i need to go get my rest...
happy tuesday to all!!...
-ramona anne
as you all have noticed from yesterday's post, i've really been digging the tune "stones in the road" lately...
today on the way to class, i was listening to that song and i was driving near the post office in town, and this little boy was walking where the sidewalk used to be before they tore it up for all the construction...my mom was driving, so i king of watched this little boy for a moment or two...he was walking and then he stopped and stooped down and gathered some of the stones in his hand and was looking at them...he had on a warm-looking red jacket and he had this beautifully messed up blonde hair....the typical image of an all american kid...
and the lines that were playing when this boy was doing this were
"And the stones in the road shone like diamonds in the dust
And then a voice called to us to make our way back home"
i thought "how beautiful of a thing that was that just happened"...it was like serendepity or something....
i wondered, what the little boy might go "home" to, though, and i started thinking about how much things have changed in today's society even from the time i was that little boy's age to what it's like for children now...in 20 years things have changed oh so very much, it's downright scary at times....
....
anyhow, i'm tired, and i despreately need sleep...i'm babysitting later today (it is after midnight, you know!!...) ... and then i've got some medical appointments...so i need to go get my rest...
happy tuesday to all!!...
-ramona anne
Sunday, October 15, 2006
stones in the road...
when i was younger, i think even before my dad passed away, there was this guy who lived up the road from me who loaned me his copy of mary chapin carpenter's tape "stones in the road"...there are some great songs on that album, because even to this day, years later, i still can hear some of them in my mind from time to time...beacuse of this, i have decided that i need to buy that cd as soon as possible, just because i absolutely loved it...
and speaking of "stones in the road" ...i absolutely love that song...i'm not sure whose version i like better, mary chapin carpenter's or joan baez's...but, it's such a great song...something about it just resonates with me...
at any rate, i figured i'd share the lyrics....i'm kind of on a "sharing lyrics" kick lately, i guess...but that's not necessarily a bad thing, is it?... :-)
Stones in The Road
(Mary Chapin Carpenter)
When we were young, we pledged allegiance every morning of our lives
The classroom rang with children's voices under teacher's watchful eye
We learned about the world around us at our desks and at dinnertime
Reminded of the starving children, we cleaned our plates with guilty minds
And the stones in the road shone like diamonds in the dust
And then a voice called to us to make our way back home
When I was ten, my father held me on his shoulders above the crowd
To see a train draped in mourning pass slowly through our town
His widow kneeled with all their children at the sacred burial ground
And the TV glowed that long hot summer with all the cities burning down
And the stones in the road flew out beneath our bicycle tires
Worlds removed from all those fires as we raced each other home
And now we drink our coffee on the run, we climb that ladder rung by rung
We are the daughters and the sons, and here's the line that's missing
The starving children have been replaced by souls out on the street
We give a dollar when we pass, and hope our eyes don't meet
We pencil in, we cancel out, we crave the corner suite
We kiss your ass, we make you hold, we doctor the receipt
And the stones in the road fly out from beneath our wheels
Another day, another deal, before we get back home
And the stones in the road leave a mark from whence they came
A thousand points of light or shame, baby, I don't know
and speaking of "stones in the road" ...i absolutely love that song...i'm not sure whose version i like better, mary chapin carpenter's or joan baez's...but, it's such a great song...something about it just resonates with me...
at any rate, i figured i'd share the lyrics....i'm kind of on a "sharing lyrics" kick lately, i guess...but that's not necessarily a bad thing, is it?... :-)
Stones in The Road
(Mary Chapin Carpenter)
When we were young, we pledged allegiance every morning of our lives
The classroom rang with children's voices under teacher's watchful eye
We learned about the world around us at our desks and at dinnertime
Reminded of the starving children, we cleaned our plates with guilty minds
And the stones in the road shone like diamonds in the dust
And then a voice called to us to make our way back home
When I was ten, my father held me on his shoulders above the crowd
To see a train draped in mourning pass slowly through our town
His widow kneeled with all their children at the sacred burial ground
And the TV glowed that long hot summer with all the cities burning down
And the stones in the road flew out beneath our bicycle tires
Worlds removed from all those fires as we raced each other home
And now we drink our coffee on the run, we climb that ladder rung by rung
We are the daughters and the sons, and here's the line that's missing
The starving children have been replaced by souls out on the street
We give a dollar when we pass, and hope our eyes don't meet
We pencil in, we cancel out, we crave the corner suite
We kiss your ass, we make you hold, we doctor the receipt
And the stones in the road fly out from beneath our wheels
Another day, another deal, before we get back home
And the stones in the road leave a mark from whence they came
A thousand points of light or shame, baby, I don't know
Saturday, October 14, 2006
rosanne cash, david francey, and life in general...
so, i missed rosanne cash last weekend, and this weekend i'm missing david francey...
it's okay, though, because i have been exposed to a lot of different music today in my experiencing the arts class, and i really don't think i'm in a place right now where i could really take in a live show (no matter how wonderful the artist) ... it's been a long day...class went from 9 am until a little after 6:00 pm....and they're going to be the same thing tomorrow...we're going to look into ballet and watch swan lake, which should be interesting...
....
after tomorrow i will have had crammed six weeks worth of classes into three days...friday night was the normal 3 & 1/2 hour session -- 5:30 until 9:00....
....
speaking of friday, did we (mom and i) ever have a friday the 13th getting down to the house in enfield...
we ended up leaving somewhat later than we were hoping to, which was rough to begin with...then mom was having a hard time parking the car at wal-mart...then wal-mart seemed to be a very time consuming thing, despite the fact that we were only buying a small number of items...it just seems like we ran into everyone we knew, and even got into conversations with random strangers....it was just one of those outings that was almost surreal....
we finally got out of there and continued on our way to the house in enfield...we ended up stopping at burger king in littleton and getting something to eat...i was already feeling slightly car sick, but i thought "well, maybe if i just get some food into my belly i'll feel better" ... not so, not so...i ate and then mom & i switched drivers so she could eat while i drove...then we switched drivers again and i read some of the reading that we needed to review for class...well, that REALLY triggered my car sickness and before she could pull over my stomach said "too much, too much!" .... luckily i was able to contain (mostly) the contents of my stomach, but the burger king bag really isn't made to hold liquids for very long, so we ended up with a bit of a mess in the car... yuck!!...
oh, but before i got carsick, while i was still reading my packets, there's this gasp from mom and then a "thwack" type of sound...apparently we hit a rather large bird...when we pulled over when i got sick, i decided to take a look...the bird was still very stuck in the grill of the car...it was a young hawk of some kind, but it was HUGE....but, that was another "yuck!" to be sure....
....
then, we head back towards the enfield/lebanon area...we missed our exit and got a little confused, and of course this took up time which we were already pressed for....so we finally get to the house in enfield and unpack the vehicle...then i head out to class and i missed my exit, and had to call back to the house to figure out where i was going...
and then i wasn't fully prepared for class, and while i had done most of everything i needed to have done for class, there were things that were due sunday that i hadn't done yet, but i thought they were due today...so last night after a mad crazy run to the p & c in west lebanon, i stayed up late and did my homework...only to find it wasn't due until sunday...oh, well, at least it's done and i can sort of relax this evening....
....
i think there's more that i wanted to write about, but it's been a long day for me, and i'm actually slightly exhausted, and i think an early bedtime might not be a bad idea...i don't think i've been to bed before midnight all week, and it's certainly catching up with me...
....
have a happy weekend, everyone...
-ramona anne
it's okay, though, because i have been exposed to a lot of different music today in my experiencing the arts class, and i really don't think i'm in a place right now where i could really take in a live show (no matter how wonderful the artist) ... it's been a long day...class went from 9 am until a little after 6:00 pm....and they're going to be the same thing tomorrow...we're going to look into ballet and watch swan lake, which should be interesting...
....
after tomorrow i will have had crammed six weeks worth of classes into three days...friday night was the normal 3 & 1/2 hour session -- 5:30 until 9:00....
....
speaking of friday, did we (mom and i) ever have a friday the 13th getting down to the house in enfield...
we ended up leaving somewhat later than we were hoping to, which was rough to begin with...then mom was having a hard time parking the car at wal-mart...then wal-mart seemed to be a very time consuming thing, despite the fact that we were only buying a small number of items...it just seems like we ran into everyone we knew, and even got into conversations with random strangers....it was just one of those outings that was almost surreal....
we finally got out of there and continued on our way to the house in enfield...we ended up stopping at burger king in littleton and getting something to eat...i was already feeling slightly car sick, but i thought "well, maybe if i just get some food into my belly i'll feel better" ... not so, not so...i ate and then mom & i switched drivers so she could eat while i drove...then we switched drivers again and i read some of the reading that we needed to review for class...well, that REALLY triggered my car sickness and before she could pull over my stomach said "too much, too much!" .... luckily i was able to contain (mostly) the contents of my stomach, but the burger king bag really isn't made to hold liquids for very long, so we ended up with a bit of a mess in the car... yuck!!...
oh, but before i got carsick, while i was still reading my packets, there's this gasp from mom and then a "thwack" type of sound...apparently we hit a rather large bird...when we pulled over when i got sick, i decided to take a look...the bird was still very stuck in the grill of the car...it was a young hawk of some kind, but it was HUGE....but, that was another "yuck!" to be sure....
....
then, we head back towards the enfield/lebanon area...we missed our exit and got a little confused, and of course this took up time which we were already pressed for....so we finally get to the house in enfield and unpack the vehicle...then i head out to class and i missed my exit, and had to call back to the house to figure out where i was going...
and then i wasn't fully prepared for class, and while i had done most of everything i needed to have done for class, there were things that were due sunday that i hadn't done yet, but i thought they were due today...so last night after a mad crazy run to the p & c in west lebanon, i stayed up late and did my homework...only to find it wasn't due until sunday...oh, well, at least it's done and i can sort of relax this evening....
....
i think there's more that i wanted to write about, but it's been a long day for me, and i'm actually slightly exhausted, and i think an early bedtime might not be a bad idea...i don't think i've been to bed before midnight all week, and it's certainly catching up with me...
....
have a happy weekend, everyone...
-ramona anne
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)